Saturday, September 09, 2006

Introducing the Hatchet Miracle Weight Loss Program!

That's right - you've heard it here first!

The brand spanking new Woman with a Hatchet's Miracle Weight Loss Program. Listen to what our satisfied clients have to say about it:

"I lost 4 pounds in 2 weeks! Without dieting!"*

You too, can have fabulous results! There's no secret, no crazy dieting (Unlike the Protein Sparing Modified Fast - ask me how I know about that one!) and no waiting. You can start your program today!

We call our program Power Gardening. Here's how it works...
  1. Walk your child to school and rack up ~5 miles per day, 5 days a week!
  2. Upon returning home from drop off, garden like mad for 4 to 6 hours per day, 5 days a week!
  3. As always, proper diet is an essential part of losing weight. Drop down to only one dessert a day!
  4. Watch those calories and try not to eat as many doughnuts or drink as many mugs of chai as you have hands!

That's it! That's all there is to it. Wake up early, walk walk walk, garden garden garden, walk walk walk and eat a little less of all those things you like to eat anyway.

This Public Service Announcement brought to you by: Woman with a Hatchet. Maker of bigger and better gardens everywhere!

* Your results may vary. Climatic conditions and school holidays may also affect your results.

---End Advertisement--

That's right, baby! I'm wearin' mah skinny jeans now!



Alessa said...

I just want to say, from my size ... fat pants, I hate your skinny little butt...not that I've seen any skinny butt evidence. How 'bout a butt shot, I could send my Mom out, as she tends to get my fat @ss in almost every picture...

wuv ya,

Woman with a Hatchet said...

Are you kidding?! Never take pics from the waist down. I never do. Never let others take pics of you from the waist down EITHER! Eww! Besides, it may be slightly smaller than it was, but that doesn't mean it's camera ready.


I'm lucky if there's ever a photo with me IN it! That would be because I'm always behind the camera, of course. In a way, it's safer back here, though!

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