I'm never having these children. Never!
Hi there! Welcome to the Weekly Whine, wherein I get to whine about just how pregnant I am. How pregnant am I? Well! Let me tell you!
I am currently 35 weeks pregnant. Thirty-five.
- Weight: +59 lbs
- Waist size: 50" +/- .5" depending on water intake
- Heart rates: ~140s for Logan and ~130s for Emma
- Fundal measurement: 47 cm. Seven weeks "past due".
- Cervical dilation: None. Nada. Zip. Did I mention I'm not dilated?
- Energy: Tired. Oh so tired. I get between 1 to 1.5 hours of sleep before my uterus contracts so hard that it hurts and I have to hobble and limp (How do you limp on both legs, anyway?) while crouched over, to the bathroom and empty my bladder. I think my uterus is attached to my hip muscles due to the way it all seems to contract together. The contraction (Still just Braxton-Hicks!) lasts for minutes before it relaxes again. The pain from the contraction means that I'm performing modified Lamaze breathing to get through the pain, while trying to be quiet and not wake Eric up. And nothing is happening to my cervix. Cervix of steel, indeed! Maybe adamantium. This also means that I am wide awake during these trips, unlike when I was pregnant with Caitlin when I could just roll out of bed, sleepwalk to the bathroom and sleepwalk back to bed. Phooey.
- My breastbone feels bruised. Is it hands? Feet? Emma's head? Inevitable due to all of that weight pulling on muscles that were never meant to be stretched this far? Due to construction work for a second story that the twins are putting in? Who knows!
Was I surprised at the news that I still wasn't dilated? No, but I really wanted to be dilated. I wanted to be told that maybe I'd be due sooner rather than later. I'm less than 3 weeks out, but this is going to be the longest 3 weeks of my life. Logically, I know it's good for the twins to stay in there but have you ever experienced chronic pain? Gaaaah! So now I feel like I can empathize with obese people, asthmatics and arthritics - all at the same time!
So...still want twins?
Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
Up to three (3) weeks left!